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nmesae

Engraved PTSD Brains and Family Pictures

There came a point where I realized that for most of the time I had been writing my dissertation, I hadn't been making nay art. I had been to absorbed in the reading and writing. So, to ease into making again, I started with some sketches that felt familiar. I looked through some of the studies on PTSD I had been reading and focused on the neuroimaging.


Sketches of Anterior Hippocampal Dysconnectivity in PTSD, Pen, Pencil on Paper

These sketches are based on a neuroscience fMRI study on “dysconnectivity” seen in PTSD patients. I find researching the neural correlates of any topic helps me approach it, and in this case, I deconstructed the MRI images into shapes of disconnect- ed brain regions as representation of the research and a starting point for artwork.


Brainshapes II (Brainstorming), Watercolor on Paper

I usually brainstorm by researching and sketching, as shown previously, but this method wasn’t sparking any ideas at the time. I was weighed down by my research and writing, and the accumulation of emotionally heavy information was blocking my creativity. So, I decided to use watercolors, hoping the looser medium would help me brainstorm. To a certain degree, this approach worked. I was happy with the compositions and took them further in other material experiments.


Engraved Brainshapes, Dremel tool on Perspex and Wood

Engraving with a Dremel tool on clear perspex was a material experimentation I wanted to pursue because it creates lines by making absences - carving out acrylic material makes white lines appear on the surface of the panel. Additionally, the transparent quality of perspex represented the there-but-not-there quality of repressed memories and denial. Thus, I engraved some of the compositions from my watercolors into perspex and made these very simple (and difficult to photograph) panels. This small scale experiment has prompted me to image how I could push this technique further, either by engraving more complex things or by creating layered or 3d objects out of the engraved panels.


Old photo, pencil sketch on paper, engraved perspex, wood

While I was experimenting with engraving on perspex I started sketching old family photos as well, and ended up transferring this sketch onto a perspex sheet. This photo became especially significant because when I asked my parents if they remembered the day this picture was taken, my mom said she remembered it well; She was pregnant with me and they had gone down to the park to play with my older brother. She remembers it was a happy day. But look at my dad's facial expression. Soon after I was born, my family decided they needed to leave the country to bring us up in a safer environment.




Then, I layered them all because why not, and although this layering wasn't the final product, this was a material experiment I enjoyed and plan to take further... the white lines on perspex are interesting to me and feel conceptually linked to my dissertation.





Engraved Photo and Brainshapes, Dremel tool on Perspex and Wood
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